I Will

I will! I promise I will
take back every thought that made me say
what I meant, but should not have said.
I will only feed her truth juice and honest bread.
I will search for her until seconds feel like hours
and every memory and fantasy has been scoured;
dragging my fatigued feet eroding into ankles from the friction.
Crawling until I'm only knees, elbows, and conviction!
And hell knows I would sell my independent mind
to present her with my body and soul.
I will forty-niner mine a minefield to find my gold.
I will write the poem Romeo dIEd thinking of
and the poisonous hymn Juliet hummed as she was drinking.
I will recede into silence and wait suspensefully
for her to miss me.
Because I will not love her... eventually.