Sunday, March 25, 2012

Poor Him

She makes him want to write a poem. Poor him.
Wants to take a shot of love with noone to pour em.
So many words to say but not enough forum.
If she reads it once, thats enough for him.
Can a Monster reeeally change his decorum?
Or will he be alone until he sees postmortem?

She makes him want to write a poem. Po' him.
The old him sees the new him- doesn't know him.
Fate will have her stripping down to show him- HER.
So he's not lookin for a towel he can throw in.
The line he dares to tread is getting so thin
and it leads to a mindset in stone that wont bend...

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Crack Baby's Dream

Every dream is like the day of a fIEnd.
When you see 'im he sways and he leans,
thinkin' of ways he can scheme
and in the same scene prays to be clean.
Wishin' he could play as a teen;
drop into school and play on a team
but he's raised to be mean.
Erased as a man.
Genetics landed him the face of his dad
not the face of a man.
He's chasing the man
with the base in his hand.
Heart pounding like the bass in a band.
He waits in the stands, the place for the fans.
He's the fan base.  He stays for a damn taste
that he can't taste.
He's on track but he can't race.
Stands in place to feel pain like canned mace.
And canned milk is like canned piss.
And the dampness of his pants pissed
is nothing 'cause that high is a can't miss.
And he rides it... no ramp miss.
Lands it but still blacks out like a lamp twist.
No brother's hug or aunt kiss.
Just the love of drugs
and less love than an ant kiss.

You Are Beautiful

Look up.
Smile at yourself the way you smile at me.
Did you melt?  I do.
In my eyes there are no flaws,
just traits to go behind "perfect".
If I were your ego I'd multipy.
I'd let the entire world know I love myself.
Pretty lady, pursed lips.
Stunning sister, sweet smell.
You are for me.  All and none.
Im sorry for them, Im sorry for him.
Can I make it up to you?
We have forever and I have plenty of ideas.
Look up.
That is exactly where you are headed.
Limits can not hold you
and "can't" is disappearing behind you.
Release yourself from those chains
and be beautiful.

Fight For Me

No rectangle
of stars and stripes
will warrant the bruises
and scars from fights.
I'd rather be beat up
in a bar by dykes,
or walk with no shoes
hella far at night.
So the Navy will choose
to recruit you next.
A new face in the masses
 of true blue vets.
And maybe they'll persuade me
to shoot through chests.
Lady Liberty's crazy and made me
fly over the cuckoo's nest.
But I won't land
in a foreign and scary land.
I'd rather have no hands
than be a military man.
I'd rather be a flamin,
merry fag and marry man.
The president is banned;
I'm taking a wary stand.
I'll be a real live "King"
better than Larry can.
See if you can sit through
sixty minutes of truth.
Flags at half-mast,
sixty men to salute.
Sixty women to boot?
Naw, that ain't fair.
Everyone can dIE for Me,
shit, I don't care!

I Decided to Pray

Last night I decided to pray
because I had a hell of a day.
I prayed for my closest
of family and frIEnds.
And the continuous focus
on these means to an end.
I prayed for my heart and the hole in it.
I prayed for my body and the soul in it.
I drowned my stresses by drinking harder.
But I was a mess and began sinking farther.
I prayed because I lIEd and cheated.
I need it because my life's defeated.
I seek the forgiveness and inner peace
to sit with God, and eat a dinner feast
with a thIEf's hands and sinner's teeth.
I prayed because prayer works.
I prayed because I should have prayed first.

Unreal Wish

I find myself with you
when Im lost in my thoughts.
And more often than not,
we're laughing.
While still moments are passing
and the time for this day dream to be over
comes closer and closer.
I wish it had never start.
There'd be no pain if we ever part.
Yet love can have no better start;
when our paths intersect
at heaven's heart and sinner's sex.
Embraced in winter and it's the best!
Like number one.
Intense 'til summer's done,
then I fall into my kneel.
It feels so real though it's surreal.
How can the present deal such a miscue?
Me being alone, wishing I could kiss you.

Overrated Up

A hint of bright makes my eyes squint
and looking up leaves my neck pinched.
So I inch along the ground like an ant town.
Not a damn sound can summon my gaze from down.
Whats up?!  Not as much.
Just sky, not a touch.
I've been there the crazy way;
gaspingly high you could maybe say.
Being below is better. By ladIEs' legs!
A cool splash in a wavy wade.
Kneel where the babies play
on grass carpet where I may lay on a lazy day.
I see up when I'm sprawling out, too.
The wind carries the loud tunes;
the sun beams as a proud muse.
But I get motion sick watching the clouds move.

Deeply Shallow

I rap about I
like the lid wraps around the eye.
Each line is wrote on truth
paper wrapped around a lie;
so when it's lit,
a hit is like a lap around the sky.
This black without the I
E
is like math without the pi.
Incomplete, take a seat,
the first act'll make you cry.
My pen is hot as an oven
and Im back to bakin' pies.
It's easy as cake!
Take a plate to the buffet,
Im the greasIEst steak.
There's deepness and pirhanas
beneath the leaves on the lake.
You will drown and get ate
if you bleed when you break.
We watch the pure thoughts
like the bereaved at a wake.
I will breathe you awake.
Why keep receiving the fake?
The verse won't lead you astray
if you belIEve in the great.
I will flood you with knowledge
just drink.
Just think.

Flowers and Gold

I had a gold coin, unplated and pure;
admired by each eye that held it.
My greed for the treasures had faded for sure
for it made me whole when I felt it.
I spit shined and polished it everyday
to make sure that there were not smudges.
But when it was stored and out of the way
the stains returned as if with grudges.

In the Garden of Eden, I cut a stem
of the thornIEst bud in the shrub.
Removed from the brIEr, oh what a gem!
The petals spread with a light rub.
I savored the fragrance of the bouquet
it entangled my heart like a vine.
If the leaves get tattered or fray
the bloom of the gods are still mine.

Gold loses value, flowers will wither
and spring will eventually fall.
Its certain to know not only snakes slither,
for even a begging man crawls.
A great horde of suitors will search for the chest
and princes will tend to the lawn.
The one that she will be devoted to next,
wont know beauty until it is gone.

I Will

I will! I promise I will
take back every thought that made me say
what I meant, but should not have said.
I will only feed her truth juice and honest bread.
I will search for her until seconds feel like hours
and every memory and fantasy has been scoured;
dragging my fatigued feet eroding into ankles from the friction.
Crawling until I'm only knees, elbows, and conviction!
And hell knows I would sell my independent mind
to present her with my body and soul.
I will forty-niner mine a minefield to find my gold.
I will write the poem Romeo dIEd thinking of
and the poisonous hymn Juliet hummed as she was drinking.
I will recede into silence and wait suspensefully
for her to miss me.
Because I will not love her... eventually.

I Cried

I crIEd this evening
because I fear my next release
will be a murderous outpour of self pity.
Strained whimpers and muffled sobs
behind the bathroom door. 
I drowned in the flooded mirror,
submerged in desolation. 
Suicidal urges are rinsed away
by my subconscious olive branch;
I promise to be better. 
Recessed anger and resentment
are ravaged during this hurricane of revelation. 
Hope floods my droughted heart
and the windows dry. 
Until tomorrow.

Which Way?

If He's perfect then show
me my purpose, I'll go!
I feel worthless in the
middle of this circle of roads.

Each step on a path
is like a mile away
from the opposite choice,
I choose to smile today.

A frown is on the polar point of this spectrum
the struggles are necessary, everyday I expect them.

Taste More Than the Surface

"I wanna taste you,"
she said.

Volunteering to lustfully consume
my hetero drive with the
expertise of the eldest professional.

She loathes her motivation for acceptance
and aspires to someday be looked
upon with reverence.

It will never happen.

The ability to satisfy my most basic
urge is undemanding and instinctual.

I require more than physical pleasure
and superficial ego-stroking.

Where is the challenge?

The task of tackling sexual conquests
has become mundane. 
Your Everest is my anthill.

She should be confident that I will remain
a steadfast suitor through an eternity of celibacy,
because her soul satiates my intimacy
needs beyond intercourse.

I demand that, at least.

Push me woman! Thrust me
into maturity with the ultimatum
of loneliness and lamentation.

I want to be cocooned of my natural
self and evolve into a man,
vital to your true happiness.

Ink of Gold

How bold a phrase- the shrink has told
me that I'm crazy but I think I'm whole.
Felt the kiss of the devil's lips, pink and cold.
No tears.  No woman's gonna drink my soul.
Again.  So I pen insanity with my ink of gold
to bring your mind out of that stinking hole.
No more living like a snake or a peeking mole.
Chained by America but the links won't hold.
Skate through life with love 'cause the rink is cold.
If they are telling the truth, why do they blink in codes?!
Bold face in your face, they wink through polls.
Im at the end of my wits, they're on the brink of goals.

Triple Threat

Dance little girl,
dance in front of the TV and behind progression.
Dance above your building blocks and below the literacy rate.
Waltz through life until you slow dance with death.

Sing little girl,
sing praises for his materials and not his substance.
Sing another heartbreaking ballad of lacked judgment.
Belt the blues and wail your tale of love's misfortunes.

Act little girl,
act like you are marginally worth what you deserve.
Act beautifully complicated as a perfect mystery.
Step into the role of necessity and break the leg of
exploitive convenIEnce.

Dance on the glass ceiling.
Sing to the heavens.
Act like a woman.

Marshmallowest Man in the World

I still have the first marshmallow my grandfather gave me. 
It fascinated me and I started saving them in safety. 
I learned how to turn marshmallows into more marshmallows. 
I studIEd how to earn marshmallows. 
At summer camp, I would never burn marshmallows.

I quIEtly accrued marshmallows and used them for shelter and food. 
With a million marshmallows I was never abused
and people were less rude to me. 
I have had my share of marshmallow-hungry women
who trIEd to dig for my marshmallows from the beginnin';
especially once I had enough marshmallows to swim in.

To ninety-nine percent of the population, marshmallows are a rarity
so I donate a few handfuls of marshmallows to charity. 
I am hardly affected by the marshmallowy disparity,
even though people lIE for and steal marshmallows. 
UnbelIEvably, people scheme to kill for marshmallows! 
It has no real value, it is only still a marshmallow.

Just to say I have marshmallows makes me happy,
though a marshmallow does not provide me happiness, exactly. 
I could pile my marshmallows into a marshmallow isle
since I have marshmallows for miles. 
They tell me it is immoral but I am in denial...
like my sixty billion marshmallows could put the AIDS cure in a buyable vial. 
Those notions are wild! 
It take more than marshmallows to feed every famished child.

My children want me to divide my marshmallows when I dIE.
Why?! These are MY marshmallows.

Lonely Times

It's only weak weekends
and solid solitude,
hollow holidays
living in an interlude.
Blind introduced
to first date intervIEws.
Just the same run through
of movIE and dinner moves.
I'm not going to lay
in the bed the sinners choose,
or taste the same fat
the repenter chews.
Tender-hearted and sore,
my love has been abused,
and my soul has been walked on
like a pair of tennis shoes.
Cuddleless in the cold-
it is the winter blues.
Im dying to pin her down,
and enter her inner tubes.
Every tender memory
exudes a mini muse.
Unprovoked attitudes... 
I remember moods,
so if I have her,
I still would know that even winners lose.

Unawake

Stare at the mess.
Straight at America's chest
and see that we've progressed
barely a step
with no access to where the next
stairway is kept.
We're snared in the net
while Big Brother doesn't get checked
and he's buried in debt.
Telling us fairy tales like they're
there to protect.
Terror and jets
can spoil milk and honey- wait for
the dairy to set.
Unapologetic politicians that don't
share the regret
or share the respect.
You will never see our cares intersect;
just go to any two corners and ask
a pair of our vets.
How dare we forget
that this country has always
been very inept
With a convoluted constitution,
can't we tear it up yet?
Will you dare to reject
and put your life on the line
to vary the bet
before you feel how tight the noose is
bare on your neck?
Or put a flame to the torch that
we've been carrying wet?
Or strip away the labeled clothes
that they wear in the sect?
Unawake but aware to elect
a safer pair to abet
in a conspiracy already set that is
as scary as death.
Spare me.
I can recognize a marionette.